On November 21, The Associated Press reported that "with increasing numbers of Hindus and Muslims living in the United States, members of these communities say arranged marriages are becoming more common, although no one tracks their numbers. These unions are very different from marriages in rural parts of their native countries where girls in their early teens can be forced by their parents to marry older men.
Here it's often a family decision with parents and children, usually in their mids, both holding veto power over potential mates.
There is the traditional arranged marriage , in which parents choose a spouse for their son or daughter although the son or daughter may decline the match and have that wish respected.
At the opposite end of the spectrum is the incredibly common and relaxed introduction-only arranged marriage , in which the couple is simply introduced by family members or friends who think they would be compatible. Their families may meet and socialize and although the parents and other family members may have strong opinions about the desirability of the match, the decision of whether to pursue matrimony is left up to the couple themselves.
Though incredibly rare in the West and in India, the custom of forced marriage is still practiced in some parts of the world, in which one or both partners have no say whatsoever in the choice of spouse sometimes under threat of punishment or death. In modern India, dowry is now officially a crime, although in many cultures, a symbolic dowry is still awarded.
The question of whether or not to have an arranged marriage is an interesting one for many young Indian-American men and women today, particularly those whose parents grew up in India and had arranged marriages themselves. Not wanting to disappoint their families or lose sight of their heritage, many of these young people give arranged marriages a chance, hoping to strike a balance between tradition and modern-day romantic compatibility.
Proponents of arranged marriage offer many arguments as to why this practice is much more likely to ensure happiness, productivity, and a healthy family life, than simply marrying for love and attraction. With the emphasis taken away from romantic love, lust, and physical attractiveness, arranged marriages are naturally more focused on practical character assets integrity, compassion, resourcefulness, industriousness and genuine affection that grows with time and experience.
Supporters often cite the remarkably lower divorce rate among arranged marriages; however, this difference is easily attributable to the fact that divorce is simply not a viable or acceptable option in many Indian communities. Arranged marriage does, however, seem to protect couples from entering a marriage based solely on physical passion, which often overrides more practical concerns that lead to long-term satisfaction.
On the other hand, many including individuals of Indian descent , feel strongly that arranging marriage inhibits freedom and independence, and that it has no place in modern society. For example, education is of prime importance for both men and women in India.
Forced marriages are condemned by most religions, though they are unfortunately common in some cultures. Arranged marriages are common in East Asia, and so Buddhism has a high percentage of arranged marriages. As with other religions, the prevalence of arranged marriages in Buddhism is due to a cultural acceptance for arranged marriages in areas where Buddhism is common. The same is true of Hinduism. Hindu marriages are commonly arranged due to social pressures for people to marry within their own social class and due to the economic opportunities and pressures caused by marriage traditions.
Learn more about marriage from the Muslim perspective here. Patheos Answers. Kathleen Mulhern is a writer, editor, historian, speaker, and professor. She teaches courses in world history, European history, and history of Christianity. Kathleen graduated with a B. Most Popular. Haitian kidnappings: Dark side of US missionary group Barry Duke.
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